The Crayon Box

Purple, green, blue and yellow

Colors in my mind

no black, no red no white

just purple, green, blue and yellow.

Colors in a crayon box.

Lilac, seafoam, cornflower, and daffodil,

colors not in my memory

all reds and blacks and the colors of shame,

but not lilac, seafoam, cornflower, and daffodil.

“Always color with all the colors in the box,” he said

“never two or three.”

Violet, forest, midnight, and ocher

pictures in my memory

these include the reds and blacks and whites.

Midnight backgrounds with white slashes on them,

forest words crossed out in red,

violet shapes distorted by black clouds

and ocher children bleeding red streams of blood that soak the paper.

These are the pictures of my mind, the pictures of my memory

These are the images I have.

Dark and evil, these pictures in my mind

run over all,

destroy all,

kill whatever good they find there.

Dark and evil pictures from man who hurt a child,

dark and evil pictures of shame,

hate,

love,

and hurt.

“Always use every color in the box,” he said,

“never just two or three.”

Purple, green, blue, yellow,

lilac, seafoam, cornflower, daffodil,

violet, forest, midnight, and ocher;

colors on my paper to show the world.

All the colors in the box,

even though all of them are

reds, blacks, and whites

to me.